Exercise: Poi Dancing and other things to babble about

Yes, I play with my balls. There I said it! It would be pretty strange yet scary to admit, but I think I'm turning into a bit of a hippy. I bought a Namaste wallet, along with fingerless gloves. Went to a Burner party in San Francisco (After party for burning man) and Fell in love with the art of POI.... I won't go into detail of what Poi is so you should google it! lol All I will tell you is, It's a form of dance. An Art. A mobile version of meditation. It's a way of expressing one's self. It relieves stress. IT HELLA BURNS CALORIES! A lot of benefits you reap when you learn about poi.

I've been learning how to Poi spin for about a week now. And I am just in love with it. It's very fun with fast music or calming music. The popular kind of Poi is fire poi. But I am not ready to play with fire yet, So LED poi will do just fine!




I've been learning how to spin Poi on youtube, as well as expertvillage.com . Type in Poi and you get a range of free tutorials on how to. Only a few words can describe how this new love intrigues me. It makes me feel free. It makes me feel sexy. It makes me feel graceful. I feel like I'm bringing my spirit out and you can see my spirit in the Poi.

Though, Right now, I'm not that good at it. I look like a robot rotating wheels. I eventually want to get good enough to be able to dance with poi and make it look even more fun. I try to dance a little lol. How do you thank someone for bringing your artistic side out? How do you thank someone for helping you discover who you are and who you want to be? If you've been on my facebook, You know who I'm talking about. I dont' have the words or the way to show how thankful I am for someone letting me be who I am. For letting me be ME. Before August 2010, I felt like I wasn't even human. Just some sort of lifeform that did nothing with her life. Simply existed. I still felt that way even after I lost the weight! I think it's because, when I lost the weight, I expected everything to work FOR me. Instead of me doing it. But I realize now, That the journey doesn't end when you lose the weight. It's only JUST beginning. I lost the weight, now the real journey begins.... The journey of finding myself and becoming who I WANT TO BE. Who knew that simply falling in love with someone could change all that.

Poi is just more than a new fun exercise to me. It's something that's making me realize that there is so much more to this world that I don't even know about, And It's helping me discover new places, new events, new and amazing people with amazing hearts and minds. I never knew how enjoyable life on this earth could be until I met the love of my life. Everyday that I wake up, and I have the chance to love, to live and to learn.... I'm immensely grateful for.

This post is VERY mushy gushy and Hippy. But I did say this is a journey of a Roux En Y'er who is living life to the fullest. Losing weight, Finding love... Can do amazing things for your mind body and soul. What a life. WHAT A LIFE!

To see how I'm doing at Poi click here

My life After everything....

So here we are....

The final steps for my Dad's business to be closed are almost complete. It's such a heart ache. I still find myself a bit angry at him for not going to the doctor. If he did, he might've been around for 20 years more or so. But no... He had to be a stubborn ass Italian and choose to die instead. (Still grieving apparently).

But as it all comes to an end, I can't help myself to be wanting everything to be as it was again (Not talking about my ex goddess forbid). I just wish my Dad was still here. I always went to him for questions I knew he had the answers to. Sometimes I swear I see signs from him everywhere... I know my mom does too.... Wednesday after work, my mom was still heartbroken about everything going on, not to mention the dumb asses who won't let her have peace... I felt so bad. I have no idea what to tell my mom to make her feel better about anything. None of us have the answers. But as I was driving down 101 North, a bus in my review mirror had the words in the marquee spell "SORRY." For a minute I thought that was my Dad saying sorry for all that's happened... I'd like to have thought it was him speaking to me. then as the bus passed me it read... "Sorry, out of service." I teared up a little in the car because I'm just so frustrated with everything. My whole family has gone through hell and nobody will let me or my mom breathe! In a way, it will be good when the business is done with, in a way, it won't be. I have to look for another job, and I'm a bit frightened I won't find the one I want because I need to renew my license by Decemeber 3rd... maybe I worry too much?

In the mean time, I found a new hobby that's keeping me quite busy. Kandi making (or beading if you want to get technical). It has become a favorite hobby of mine aside from photography. I just love seeing the different patterns come together to make something beautiful. And the funnest part is when I get to give them away to people who will like them. It's kept my mind off of things that are currently happening right now. I also noticed a majority of the people on my Facebook do Kandi as well! and they have made extraordinary patterns by far! I hope to be a part of a kandi making party sometime soon. Maybe get a few pointers.

Life at home as been utterly serene. Despite the fact that I don't necessarily admire our neighbors (Because they are always loud all the time and play loud trumpet mexican music. and sorry if that sounded racist, but that's what they play). Despite that, Life is beautiful. I love my life at home. I always found myself dreading going home to negativity, screaming and pure depression, Now I come home to smiles and happy vibes. It's amazing. Not to mention, My honey's helped me blossom even more to the person I wanted to be. I'm more social now and I'm not afraid to talk to people anymore. I still get iffy sort of around big crowds, but I'm learning to over come that.

I've also been shown some new genres of music which I'm just falling head over heels for... Combichrist is just eargasms all day long in my car. Headhunterz is just hella fun to dance to, and K12, omg K12 is sick! Speaking of music.... I went to lupin lodge for the first time with my honey and a couple friends, and there was the first time I ever had the guts to dance in front of people! Didn't care who was watching! That's how I always wanted to feel! Just be myself and not care what anyone thinks.... It's a beautiful feeling.

Aside from my job problem, I'm so happy with where my life is now... I have no regrets for the decisions I made to leave my ex, in fact, it probably was the best thing I had ever done. Because Now look where I am at? I'm no longer afraid. And I'm just blooming out of my shell! Thanks to my baby. Life is good!